Hiking Simulator 2017

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! - Enjoy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2eZNEdlmbxo Best game of the year? Best game of the decade? Best game ever made? How about NONE of the above! This is yet another rushed, lazy game made in a single afternoon or night and is nothing more than one of the ugliest walking simulators I've ever experienced. Worse yet, this developer states this game is words like a "breakthrough" and "life changing" in his own description of this game, but he used one of the absolute worst game making tools to develop it with Game Guru, found here on Steam for under $20. Complete trash and another example of why the new Steam Direct system looks to be even worse than the old Steam Greenlight. Asset flips and rushed crap like "this" to try and make a quick buck seem to be flooding Steam in higher volumes than ever before. Value (even at 59 cents): NEGATIVE 5. (Out of 40 possible) Fun: ZERO (Out of 30 possible) Controls and Bugs 10 (Out of 20 possible) Graphics &...

I've come to appreciate the following equation... Game Guru = Can't Code Hiking simulator is a blatant cash grab from an affiliation of shonky marketers. That being said, the most surprising thing is that the ring leader behind it all, is Rasmus Ladegaard the developer and producer behind the tv docu series 'The history of Video games' http://www.imdb.com/title/tt6178594/?ref_=nm_flmg_wr_4 6 walking tracks that require you to walk around in a circle where several npc animals have been placed and are programmed to run away if you ever get close. Talking about the animals, why do they all walk like they have something stuck up their butt? Why are there trees floating in the air? Why does water kill you if you touch it? Why can't I pick anything up? Why did I buy this??? Yes, there is nothing to do in this game other than walk, jump, and be a lemming at the top of a cliff. It is possible to climb the boundaries if you are persistent enough to find the glitches and you then can go see...

Complete pile of garbage - same as the rest of GaymGuru produced things, but here you won't even found any kind of gameplay, you just wander around of 6 maps made of free things you can find in a game guru library, you can even chase some animals (there are no words to describe how the god damn horse waving her bиtt, try to search on youtube idk). The only thing you can do here is to suicide - when you enter any water surface you die right away Also includes features like +5 minutes long loading +3 fps +copypasted textures that don't connect perfectly. +Animal bиtts cus animals run directly from you when you are in 50 meters range. +6 different places to do nothing in. GOTY

Even actually going outside is better.

Trash asset flip. Horribly optimized, ugly to look at and an overall piece of grade A garbage.

If you played this game and liked it and there are hidden paths and you can actually DO something, let me know so I can go back and then rewrite the review. Otherwise… Graphics are not quite as good as Turok from 1997 which I played recently and it runs worse than Turok on my machine which makes no sense as there are no animations other than a few animals (mostly stuck in walls) and no ambient sounds. The gray rocky walls in the first area reminded me of the graphics in the original Doom. Hilly Landscape map was kind of a non-event. Then Mountain Top and I look at the mountains in the distance and think “Now that’s what I’m talking about!”. Oh, wait… All you can do is LOOK at the mountain tops and the actual map is about as interesting as Hilly Landscape. The pine grove could have been nice except for the impenetrable branches and I wound up coming out pretty much where I started. And in one spot I rotated 360 and saw 3 of one and 2 of another identical boulders so ...

Sometimes, when I buy a game that's bad I get sad, you know like no man's wallet. However, there comes a point where you purchase a game, that is so unbeliveably awful, you're glad you bought it. I wonder which I would catagorise this under...

Simply phenomenal. This breathtaking experience is unlike anything experienced by mankind. This game is proof that God is real. No human is capable of the pure joy this game produces. I must warn you, if you play for too long you will become entranced and you will never be able to stop playing. I had to stop after a mere 0.2 hours because my mortal brain cannot comprehend the level of beauty and wonder this game provides. If I had to donate my life savings to play this game I would, but the developers priced it at a bargain of 79 pence. If you do not have this in your steam library already you have not experienced living. You NEED this game, your soul requires it.

At least the Uninstall feature works.

10/10 crashed when i hit save game lol