Procemon: You Must Catch Them

I think this is supposed to be a meme game? I don't want to be rude, but I sincerely could not tell. The majority of the stats expressly do nothing (as suggested by the in-game joke GameFAQ walkthrough), and there's nothing to do besides a set of three attacks per monster. Perhaps I had a bad seed, but for the duration of my time I only saw attacks which dealt either 2 or 3 damage, and since I couldn't acquire any monsters with the stronger attacks, I couldn't do anything. The generated monsters and attacks and such are silly and neat but aren't really much more than some basic language parsing stuff. (It's at least not an AI training scam or something, so that's a plus.) I have to assume that this was largely a small project that was kicked out with some simple mechanics, something that would be perfect as a free or cheap Itch game or some such, but I definitely can't recommend buying it here.

This game is completely incoherent. It's impossible to know what creatures are good, what your moves do, what status effects do, or any other useful information because it's 99.9% randomized. Enemy "trainers" spout randomized babble. This game is something only an AI could make sense of.

Note; Unfortunately due to the first of the cons I've listed, I had to stop playing for now and will attempt again at a later date. I did want to post this first impressions review, though. == Pros > As it says on the description, it is a very retro game. This includes graphics, music, and mechanics. > As described, it's a creature collector with RPG elements. Battle your creatures, level them up, battle more. > I love the "Seed" idea - find seeds, travel, explore random maps. == Cons > Despite having "High-res" (window size increased, graphics stretched to fit) enabled, the graphics unfortunately give me a headache after a very little amount of playtime. > Despite being "retro-style" it doesn't have the QoL expected from "newer" games. > The randomly generated descriptions, and flavor text are somewhat distracting and make no sense. It was difficult to tell story from flavor. This may be expected - I'm unsure. > No sort of in-game help or explanation of mechanics, etc. No objective ...

I’m really enjoying this game! It’s all randomly generated and it’s a blast. All your creatures, their moves, and character dialogue you encounter is procedurally generated. The results are often hilarious. My Snakesnake learned the move “reptile mouth”. It doesn’t get better than that haha! Buy it!

Cheesemento learned Hot Milk! I combined a conifer type and a snake type and got Pinesnake! Conifer types are weak to cereal! We defeated Big Licorice!

i destroyed my linguistically confused foes with my fermented barbeque skills

You would probably have better luck with making yourself dizzy and reading a book than trying to understand the game. An interesting experience. I don't think it's worth 9,99 though. Not horrible but not great either. Would definitely continue to play but I don't know if I could recommend this.

I honestly am not 100% sure what I'm playing, how I'm playing, and why I'm playing. all i know is my Centaurbique and I are taking down the universe together... realistically though this is such a trip of a game that feels like such a strange adventure that it is hard for me to put down as i just want to figure out more of what this game will throw at me

I bought this on a whim and ended up refunding it. It is exactly what it advertises itself to be, for better or worse. For me, it was an incomprehensible mess that was devoid of any real entertainment value. If you're after a randomly generated monster collecting experience, PokeRogue and Rogue Emerald are much more enjoyable, and don't cost any money. This game...I would only recommend if you have ever entered "Glitch City" in the original Pokemon games and thought it would be great to have an entire game that consisted of that experience. Otherwise, just move on.

Procemon is basically the best combination of Pokemon, DWM and Random generation I can think of. The only thing that could make it better is if I could play it on a gameboy or gameboy shaped device. Also love all the support from the dev, any issues I've had with the game were resolved quickly and it really seems like they care about making this a good game.